What To Talk About On a First Date

There’s a good chance you’ve been out of the dating scene, busy focusing on your professional life. Now that you’ve decided to try and find love, you’re unsure of your footing. It’s natural, since even those who date commonly end up tripping over themselves. Especially when it comes to the conversation topic. Conversations can get awkward fairly quickly if you don’t know what to talk about on a first date . That’s why you’re here: To get prepared for that first date.

Of course, there’s no master plan that works in every situation. Each date is a unique experience. That said, there are still guidelines that might come in handy for you.

Here are some questions that will teach you what to talk about on a first date  :

What is your career? What do you like/dislike the most about it?
Did you always want to be a ________ when you were younger?
Tell me, do you have any skills that you think are unique?
Is there anything you’re really good at, or bad at?
What type of hobbies do you have?
Are you absolutely obsessed with anything?
What was the last video you watched? How did it make you feel?
Do you have pets? If so, what kind?

Would you join a dating agency
What do you do to relieve stress?
Would you consider yourself uptight, or easy-going?
Are you a leader, or a follower?
What is your favourite season, and why?
What is your favourite television show, and why?

Ask your date to tell you about themselves in more detail, because it makes them feel like you’re truly interested. Make sure you listen as well! Questions about skills and hobbies help you to know more about someone. It also helps to see what the two of you have in common, which is a good thing to know.

Of course, there are heavier questions that you absolutely need to ask on a first date. Such as:

What are your future career plans?
Do you have a family? Do you have any plans to have a family in the future?
Are you looking to settle down?
Are you actively involved in any teams, groups or organisations?
Political/religious views?

These questions are all aimed at determining compatibility. If your date is actively in groups, you may not have enough time to see each other. If your date wants a family and you’re not looking to settle down, you’re not going to be compatible. These questions can be asked at the beginning of the date, or later on. Some of them are a little deeper, so asking them right away would be a bad idea. But it’s important to know these details before making a second date arrangement.

If you’re having a great conversation, here are some other things you can talk about:

Describe yourself in three words
Past dating experiences
Major life events and what you’ve learned from them
What is the strangest thing that has ever happened to you?

As an added suggestion: Write some of these down on cue-cards. That way, you can refer to them when you want to know what to talk about on a first date. If your date calls you out on it, turn the awkwardness into a joke. A little bit of humour goes a long way, especially when it comes to breaking the ice. If you’re lucky, you’ll never need to refer to the cue-cards. But if you need them, they would be there.

James Preece
Dating Coach and Dating Expert at The Dating Guru

James Preece is the Dating Guru.


He is the UK’s leading Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, helping 1000s find love each year.


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