Relationships aren’t something you can just learn about in a textbook, you can research how to be the perfect girlfriend or boyfriend but only being there and going through it will teach you the ins and outs of dating.
Relationships can be amazing, finding the one you love and wanting to be with them is a wonderful feeling. However, they can also be toxic and miserable at times. The saying goes it takes two to tango to make your relationship last you both have to put the effort in to make it a success.
What you have to remember is, dating in the 21st century is completely different to how your nan and grandad did things. We now have social media tearing couples apart and lots of other apps and media to contend with. Dating was much simpler 50 years ago.
Long Distance Love
Unfortunately, we may not all be destined to be with the man or woman who lives just around the corner. Sometimes we fall for someone who lives many miles away. Long-distance relationships can be hard and can definitely take their toll on both of you. Trust is a huge component of making long-distance work. You have to know that your other half isn’t meeting other people when you are potentially on the other side of the country or world.
You don’t have to communicate with each other 24 hours a day as if you are always talking and feeling like you have to reply then things are quickly going to head south and it can become tiresome for one or both individuals. However, there has to be a healthy balance here as not enough messaging and talking can lead to suspicions and lack of trust.
There are other ways to communicate and have fun when you are in a long-distance relationship. You can send each other pictures and video call whenever you get the chance. When you see each other again make sure it is special as time is precious for both of you. Go on outings or simply just stay cuddled up in bed.
Talk About It
Communication is key if you want to make your relationship last. Human beings are not mind-readers so if there is a problem you have to talk it through rather than holding it in otherwise you may as well kiss goodbye to your whole relationship. Being open and honest about everything will lead to a healthy long-lasting relationship.
Another issue you may come across is miscommunication over messaging apps, this is quite common as you may mean one thing but it gets interpreted as something completely different. If there is anything important to be said that could easily be misconstrued it is best said over the phone or in person.
If you have a lot of trouble talking to each other, then you may want to consider seeking professional help from a counsellor. They will help you work through any issues you might have.
Time For Each Other
Spending time with your significant other is vital and much needed if you want to make your relationship last. Go on dates and be spontaneous, this will keep the spark alive. If for whatever reason you are not in the same place at the same time you can still arrange a date, it just has to be virtual.
Here are some handy tips on How to have the perfect virtual date. Arrange a suitable time that works for both of you and a time that you know will not get interrupted with anything else. Don’t forget to make an effort as well, just because you are at home and not actually going out does not mean you get to slob about in your tracksuit bottoms. Your other half will really appreciate the effort and a nice shirt or gorgeous dress will go a long way.
You could even have a cooking date, put the phone or laptop in the kitchen and cook the same thing together at the same time. This will be a good laugh and is something different to the normal sitting at a table, talking about your day.
Another great way to make time for each other is to watch films together or play video games on the same team. This enables you to spend quality time together doing something you both love and enjoy. It’s a great way to make your relationship last.
Again, if you are away or living in separate houses, most consoles have the ability to speak to others while watching the screen and Netflix even has the technology to be shared these days. So no matter where you are, you and your other half will have great fun.
Be Independent
Nobody likes a clingy person, that includes your other half. Just because you are in a relationship with that person does not mean you have to be with them 24/7. It is perfectly healthy to miss someone and want to see them but it is vital for your own mental health to spend time apart.
Before you got in a relationship you would be spending time either on your own or with your family and friends so why does it need to change because you found love, it doesn’t. Arrange that brunch date with your besties or go out for drinks with the boys. Your other half will still be there at the end of the day to hear all about it.
Make Your Relationship Last With Compliments
If you want to make your relationship last it is important to give and take compliments. Give at least one compliment a day, this will boost your partner’s self-esteem and confidence. There are many people out there who dislike the way they look so a compliment really does go a long way. Don’t get mad if your partner doesn’t accept your compliment, just keep up the good work and one day they will look at themselves and really believe what you say and believe all the compliments from then on.
We hope this helps you realise that love is a wonderful thing when done the right way, nobody really knows what that right way is but we are sure you will find out when the time is right. After all, there is someone out there for everyone.
He is the UK's leading Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, helping 1000s find love each year.
