He Doesn’t Call Or Text For Days

Everyone has encountered this problem at least once. For some, it’s after the first date. For others, it’s before you take the connection offline. It can be frustrating to left hanging, unsure of what caused the silence. Many people tend to jump to conclusions and even panic! While that’s not exactly helpful, it’s hard to keep your cool when you’re just looking for answers.

In the modern dating age, ghosting is common. This is when someone you’re talking to just disappears, for no reason. When they pop back into your inbox after a few days, it sends mixed signals about what’s going on. This is often because he’s keeping you as an “option” in case someone else doesn’t work out. It’s annoying to say the least. It would be nice if more people were honest and upfront, but our modern method of dating makes it too easy to play games.

Maybe he’s not interested in you and doesn’t know how to tell you.

There may also be genuine reasons he doesn’t call or text for days. If it’s unlike him to just disappear, it’s probably innocent. He could be having family issues that requires his attention. He could be on a trip in the woods and his reception isn’t great (though unlikely, it is possible). He could be extremely busy in his personal life or with work. Maybe he’s just not glued to his phone and hasn’t checked in a few days.

If he tends to disappear for a few days, it may still be innocent enough. He could be playing “hard to get” by making you wait between exchanges. This may be his way of trying to “play it cool” as well. He doesn’t want to seem overly eager, so he’s trying to space out his replies. He could also be nervous or anxious about talking to you, so it takes a while to gather his courage. There’s another complicated option to consider: He likes you, but he doesn’t really know what he’s looking for. As a result, he might keep you at a distance while he tries to figure it out for himself.

Of course, you don’t have to wait until he makes the first move.

Consider the last exchange you had with him. Did you say something open-ended that he could reply to or was it a simple message? Many guys claim they didn’t know what to say, so they didn’t bother trying to continue the conversation. If this is the case, you can test it. Try texting or calling him with a fun “getting to know you question”. Maybe ask about something he mentioned doing/enjoying. If he replies and seems interested, then it’s the conversation he got over, not you.  it’s not too late to learn how to save a relationship now.

I know it can be confusing if he doesn’t call or text for days on end. Unfortunately, there is no direct way to find out if someone is genuinely interested in you or playing games. You can try calling him out, but most people get defensive and you’ll end up with no answer. The worst thing you can do in this situation is become aggressive. A string of angry and accusatory text messages won’t get you any further. You do have to give him some time to make contact.

What do you do in the meantime? Busy yourself. The worst thing you can do for your own mental health is sit around and wait for someone. Go out with your friends or take yourself out. Enjoy your life. This way, if he was playing games, you didn’t fall for it. If he was genuinely busy, you’ll get to tell him all about the things you did in between communications.

Sometimes the pattern will repeat itself. If he doesn’t call or text for days then it’s time to focus on someone who treats you with respect.  Do check out my dating coaching for women package and I can help you right away.