Are you starting to get back out into the dating world? If so, then you need to make sure that you are attracting the right matches and getting the attention that you need to find the perfect partner for you. There are a few steps that you can take here, so let’s jump right in. 


Don’t Be Too Serious


You need to be able to laugh at yourself and show that you’re not taking things too seriously. It’s important that you seem relaxed and not constantly on edge. In terms of your dating profile, you should think about ways to add a little humor that isn’t too cringe-worthy. Essentially you need to show your personality and you really are inside. On the date, you need to make sure that you aren’t being too dramatic. Most women are looking for someone who is fun to be around a little carefree. This is a balancing act as it’s important that your behavior doesn’t suggest that you are nihilistic where nothing really matters at all. Particularly, if you are hoping to find someone who is looking for something long term


Be Honest


While simple advice, it’s important not to overlook how crucial it is to remain honest. The first sign of deception will turn someone right off and immediately place you on the wrong path. 


Demonstrate You Are Goal Focused


Most people don’t want someone that is completely work or business orientated. However, at the same time, they also don’t want to date someone that has no professional prospects. You need to show that you are working on your professional life without being completely career-obsessed. There are a few ways to do this. However, we recommend that you think about mentioning your career in a dating profile without bombarding them with your professional achievements. You should also make sure that they can Google you and find something that is tied to your career. This could be a LinkedIn profile, or if you own your own company, a business address. Remember, if you manage your business it might be best to use a virtual address using a service like, rather than show that you are working from home. This suggests that you are more successful. Even if you do run a successful business from the comfort of your own home, it can send the wrong message. 


The Right Photos 


If you are looking to attract the right matches, then it’s impossible to ignore the importance of photos. Particularly when you think about how to attract the right people through dating websites. Now bear in mind, this isn’t about looking conventionally attractive but rather sending the right message. It’s fair to say that there’s a science to who gets the most matches based on the photos on a dating profile. For instance, you need at least one photo where you’re with a group. This should be further into your dating profile and clearly demonstrates that you are sociable and outgoing. It shows that you are not isolated and that you do have a social life. You have friends or family and personal connections. It also demonstrates that you are fun and that you don’t spend all your time by yourself. If you only have photos of yourself, people are going to wonder why this is and where your friends are. 


You also need to make sure that you have at least one photo that relates to an interesting or exciting activity. It has to show something about your personality and it doesn’t matter what this is. A classic example would be a photo of you skydiving which demonstrates that you are adventurous but there are lots of possibilities here. 


One thing that you should avoid is using filters. There is a slight double standard here because filters are often seen as more acceptable for women than for men. Women prefer dating profiles where guys haven’t used filters because it shows that they are genuine and aren’t trying to conceal their flaws. 


We hope this helps you understand some of the key ways that you can guarantee you will be more attractive to potential matches who could be interested in dating you. Remember, there are lots of sites that investigate how people choose who they want to date such as


By taking this advice, you can make sure that you are putting your best foot forward with people who could be your perfect match. You might think that some of these tactics are deceitful. However, nothing that we have mentioned alters who you are. Instead, it just accentuates the characteristics that people are often searching for when they choose matches and potential dates. They will still be getting to know the real you once they meet you. 



James Preece
Dating Coach and Dating Expert at The Dating Guru
James Preece is the Dating Guru.

He is the UK's leading Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, helping 1000s find love each year.