Dating Confidence Tips Guide
As human beings, we tend to put a lot of pressure on dating. A “successful” date is the ideal outcome, but that success is measured differently to each person. How do you define a successful date? How does your date define successful? This serious undertone comes out when you start focusing too much on the result of the date, instead of just enjoying yourself. If that sounds familiar, keep reading.
1. Be Prepared
You won’t be able to control what happens, nor should you. A date is the most enjoyable when it flows organically and you’re both feeling comfortable. Being prepared means that you have an idea of what you’d like to know about the other person. Being prepared means you know what you’re looking for too. You don’t want a date to come across as an interrogation, but it’s important to ask questions and listen to the answers. If you want to go a step further, prepare yourself “talking points”. This can give you something to refer to when you’re feeling nervous or want to break the silence.
2. Know What You’re Looking For
Too often, we venture into the dating world without really evaluating our intentions. It’s find to think you want a companion, someone to spend time with. But how much time do you want to spend with someone? Are you looking for a short-term fling or a future spouse? These are the questions you have to ask yourself before arranging a date with anyone. You’re not going to find what you’re looking for if you don’t even know what that is. Make sure you sit down and have an honest conversation with yourself. When you’re sure of what you want, people generally respond accordingly. That’s one of the most important dating confidence tips you need.
3. Ditch Your Expectations
Another dating failure we all make is that we go into our dates with an expectation. Whether we’re making expectations of the outcome or of the individuals themselves, we are creating a fabricated situation inside our heads. Often, we even project those ideals onto other people. When they don’t meet our expectations, we consider it a failure. Yes, it’s important to know what your deal-breakers are. Everyone has something they aren’t willing to negotiate. But consider the importance of your deal-breakers. You may be limiting yourself with unrealistic expectations.
4. Ditch Your Baggage
Let’s start by saying: Everyone has baggage. It’s how you choose to carry your baggage that really matters. You may be letting a fear or rejection prevent you from starting a conversation with someone. You may worried you’re not worthwhile. You may feel like you’re too boring, and someone wouldn’t want to date you. There’s nothing wrong with feeling anxious. Everyone tends to feel a lack of confidence when it comes to dating. These dating confidence tips should definitely help you!
5. Don’t Repeat The Same Mistakes
Every experience holds a lesson, as long as you’re open to looking for it. The only thing your past is good for is teaching you about your future. When it comes to dating, you take what you’ve learned and leave the rest behind. It helps to look over your previous dates and relationships. While you don’t want to spend too much time focusing on what went right or what went wrong, there may be some obvious moments. It’s a good idea to take note of things you’d do differently. If you look at every date as a learning opportunity, then you’ll never go on another unsuccessful date.
6. Don’t Take Rejection Personally
After a few “unsuccessful dates”, it can be easy to feel like you’re the problem. It’s important to remind yourself that rejection doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It’s simply that you are not what that person is looking for. Perhaps they are clinging to their expectations a little too hard. Perhaps you are. Either way, those expectations tend to be the end of the dating experience. You just have to keep putting yourself out there. That’s one of my most effect dating confidence tips. Even when it seems like no one is interested, you’re likely to be surprised. When you put your best foot forward, you step towards success.
7. Understand Your Anxieties
The worst thing to do is get stuck inside your own head. It happens too often. As humans, we over-analyse everything we do. The mistakes we’ve made, and the highlights as we see them. On the other hand, other people don’t pay any attention to us. They are too busy over-analysing everything they are doing. If you think you’re talking too much, they may have gone quiet because they felt like they were talking too much. It’s never a bad idea to communicate your nerves with someone. They likely feel exactly the same, and it’ll help make the situation less tense. A date shouldn’t feel like an interrogation. A date should feel like catching up with an old friend.
8. Become A More Interesting Person
One of the best ways to feel more confident is to work on improving yourself. It doesn’t have to be something big, like going back to school for a degree. You can make small improvements right now, with minimal effort. Create a new routine for yourself. Switch up your favourite coffee shop. Join a gym. Take a class or participate in a workshop. Take up sports. There are many ways you can work on improving yourself that will also boost your confidence. You may even meet someone through a shared activity!
9. Be Willing to Seek Support
It may be hard to ask for support when it comes to dating confidence tips and tricks. If you’re not comfortable speaking to friends and family, try reaching out to a support group. It doesn’t have to be a local one. Find a support group online. Talk to other people who are going through the same issues as you. This is a great way to learn from other peoples’ experiences. If you’re really struggling, you can always reach out to a life coach, dating coach, or matchmaking service.
10. Just Be Yourself
It has become too common to meet someone who is presenting themselves as a “catch”. Yet many of them have dull personalities or ridiculous expectations. It’s refreshing to meet someone who is comfortable presenting themselves exactly the way they are. Being comfortable with yourself is truly the ultimate sign of confidence. If you don’t feel like you’re enough, just the way you are, you may need to re-read a few of the previous points.
I hope these dating confidence tips have given you some inspiration. If you’d like some more personal advice, please do book in a dating coaching session with me today using one of the links at the top of this page.
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