Making a decision isn’t always easy, especially when you’re dealing with relationships. When you’re choosing between two guys, you know that someone is going to end up hurt. At the same time, you don’t want to lose the chance to find true happiness because of someone else’s feelings. This puts you in an awkward situation, having to decide which person is right for you.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, that’s normal. Below you’ll find 6 helpful tips about how to choose between two guys:

 

Compare what you like and don’t like about each man

 

When you are trying to decide how to choose between two guys, the first thing you want to do is make a comparison. Decide what you like about each man, then decide what you don’t like about them. It’s most helpful to write this down, so you can visually see the differences. If either man has traits you consider “deal-breakers”, then your decision should be based on those elements. If neither have deal-breakers for you, then you’ll want to continue with this list.

 

Weigh the differences and similarities between each man

 

Now that you’ve looked at the pros and cons, compare the differences and the similarities. Not only to each other, but to your ideals and what you’re looking for in the future. You should notice a pattern in your ideals. Each man should have a few traits in common. These are the things you’re looking for in a partner. Whichever man has the most in common with your ideals is likely the choice you’re going to make.

 

How do you feel when each man is around?

 

The way you feel when you’re around each man should help with choosing between them. If you feel excitable or like you’re on top of the world, that could be love. It could also be nothing more than surface attraction. Sometimes, it’s hard to tell when you’re deeply attracted to someone. You wouldn’t want to choose the wrong person because you misread your own signals.

 

Trust your instincts to help you learn how to choose between two guys

 

Too often we neglect our instincts or mistake our intuition for fear. The truth is, when you’re faced with any decision, big or small, you already know which option you want to pick. Deep down, your heart has all the answers. The trick is to listen to your heart, to know what it is saying and to act accordingly. But know the difference between your intuition and your desire.

 

Don’t rush the decision

 

When you’re choosing between two guys, it can be hard to be patient. You want to let one of them know the bad news, sooner than later. It’s the decent thing to do. At the same time, you don’t want to make a decision with any haste. You want to weight out the details and take time to decide. This isn’t hard if neither man knows you’re making this decision. If they know, you may feel some pressure. Ignore the pressure because you need time to think.

 

 Ask for input from friends & family

 

When you’re stuck choosing between two guys, you can easily get caught up with emotions. You may worry about letting someone down or making the wrong choice. It may be helpful to ask someone outside of the situation for help. This should be a close family member or friend who has your best interest in mind. They will weigh in and you’ll be able to use their opinion to make a more educated decision. If you don’t have someone to ask then consider hiring an expert dating coach for women like me to help you decide.

 

If you’ve tried everything above and you’re still stuck on how to choose between two guys, then try this trick: Find any coin, assign each man a side of the coin, throw it in the air. As you throw it, you’ll notice that you’ve decided which side you want the coin to land on. Don’t focus on the literal result of the coin. Trust the image that popped into your head when you tossed the coin up in the air. 

James Preece
Dating Coach and Dating Expert at The Dating Guru
James Preece is the Dating Guru.

He is the UK's leading Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, helping 1000s find love each year.