Today, I’m delighted to welcome dating coach  Sebastian Harris who has written a fascinating guest blog for you to enjoy about meditation

When I ended up in a relationship with my ex-girlfriend I wasn’t ready for it. To be honest, I was immature, unable to focus my energy on our relationship and deep down I felt unworthy of having a girlfriend. Even though my ex-girlfriend was definitely not the perfect match for me, my mind, my body and my brain were not ready to commit to anyone.

When I ended up in a relationship with my current girlfriend, things were different. This time I was ready for it. I was ready to open my heart to the exciting and beautiful feeling of getting to know another human being. I was ready to connect with her on such a deep level, that she couldn’t do anything but falling in love.

Everything was different than in my previous relationship. I had no fears, no insecurities and I saw the emerging relationship as an opportunity to grow and not as a path to less freedom. Of course I experienced a lot between those two relationships and I definitely grew in more than one area. However, I can’t deny that my regular meditation practice is one reason why I was finally able to allow the right person to come into my life.

It might sound unbelievable, but meditation taught me more about myself and my ability to form relationships, than anything else. In the following lines I want to show you that attracting the right woman isn’t that hard. Ten minutes of mindfulness and relaxation can be all that is needed.

Loving Yourself is the First Step Towards Being Loved 

I was never really driven by self-hate, but to say that I loved myself would be an exaggeration. All in all I was okay with who I was, even though I was haunted by the same insecurities that most men have to battle with.

I always had the feeling that I was too unattractive, too poor and too uninteresting. No matter what I did, I always had the feeling that I wasn’t enough. In case you are struggling to attract the right woman, you probably know what I am talking about. You don’t love yourself, you don’t hate yourself, but something feels not right.

I had this feeling that something just isn’t right for a very long time. One day, I had just started to meditate for about two weeks, this feeling of not being enough changed into a feeling of deep self-love. I know it sounds cheesy, but during one of my meditation sessions it struck me. Suddenly, I didn’t feel incomplete anymore. I felt at peace with myself. I was enough. This is an incredibly beautiful feeling that meditation can provide you with.

I think we all know the saying that you must first love yourself before you are able to attract love. It is true. Shortly after I had this feeling of being at peace with myself, I was able to attract the most amazing woman I have ever met.

The Focus to Go After What You Want Gives You What You Want 

While meditation is a great way to relax and to calm your mind, it is also a scientifically proven way to increase your focus. Every successful person can confirm that focus is an important ingredient of success, no matter if it’s success in business or in your dating life.

A strong and goal-oriented focus allows you to focus all your energy on getting what you want. Meditation has the power to increase and to sharpen your focus. It is then on you if you use it to attract success in other areas of your life, or if you use this focus to attract an amazing relationship.

When I first realized that meditation had increased my focus, I was suddenly able to see a clear picture of the woman of my dreams. I literally saw her in front of me before I even met her. I knew what personality traits and what values she has. Thanks to this focus I looked out for a woman who fulfilled these criteria and I eventually found her.


A Confident Mind Attracts Confident Women 

Speaking of attracting the woman of your dreams…

I am pretty sure that you want to attract a confident woman who loves herself and her life.  I haven’t yet met one man who dreamed about attracting an emotionally unstable girl with more psychological issues than Lindsay Lohan. However, I met a lot of guys who ended up in relationships with such girls.

One of the reasons why there are thousands of people (both men and women) who end up in relationships with partners who are anything but good for them, is their lack of self-confidence. The law of attraction says that you can only attract who you are and if you are an insecure guy without any self-esteem, you will most likely attract the female equivalent to you.

Meditating on a regular basis can put an end to this vicious cycle. Somehow I am still fascinated at how my self-perception and eventually my self-confidence changed by simply meditating a couple of minutes every day. The change seems unreal, but it is there. This change can be the critical variable that allows you to attract a confident and life-affirming woman.


Your Awareness Lets You See the Signs 

We men can do a lot of things to get noticed by women, but we are not the only ones who want to get noticed in the crowd. When a woman sees a man she is attracted to, she sends out all kinds of signals in the hope that those signals will motivate him to talk to her. This might be a short glimpse, a sudden change of her posture or a very subtle lip bite.

The big problem that a lot of women are facing is that none of the guys they are interested in have the necessary awareness to read and to interpret those signals. When it comes to the subtle signals of women, most guys walk around with blinders.

Once you are meditating on a regular basis, you will experience how it feels to live without those blinders. Meditation helps you to develop a higher level of awareness. This increase in awareness can be all you need in order to not overlook the signal of the woman of your dreams.


If you are a dating expert or relationship expert and would like to write a guest blog for me, please get in touch.

James Preece
Dating Coach and Dating Expert at The Dating Guru
James Preece is the Dating Guru.

He is the UK's leading Dating Coach and Relationship Expert, helping 1000s find love each year.