How to Make New Friends As An Adult
Learning to make new friends as an adult is so hard. As little kids, making friends was super-easy. We could walk up to someone in the playground and sit down beside them. We could push a stranger on a swing set and walk away with a new best friend. Sharing juice boxes or switching lunches at school was a great way to build a lasting friendship. Unfortunately, doing the same as an adult will make you seem a little strange. As a relationship expert I know this results in many people being lonely. So, how exactly do adults make friends?
In this age of technology, it should’t shock you that there are apps. Similar to Tinder, there is a swiping feature, profiles, often integrated with social media. These apps, unlike Tinder, are designed for those of us who are only looking for friends. In fact, Tinder has a separate app for just friends. Did you know that? It’s called Tinder Social. It functions a lot like Tinder, but the intention is only to make friends with other users. It’s a little less personal than one on one, because it uses a social group feature. The idea is to create a group (2+ people), then connect with other groups. Obviously, that’s not going to work for everyone.
There are other apps to consider if you want to make new friends as an adult. To list a few:
– Bumble BFF (Leading developers with dating app Bumble, they have now branched into a friendship based application for those who just want to be a little more social. With the same features as Bumble, only a whole new goal!)
– Skout (Not focused on local connections, instead pairing you with people all over the world.)
– Tinder Social (Of course!)
Of course, apps aren’t the only way to make friends. We don’t live in a technology-exclusive world quite yet. You can still meet people the old fashioned way, depending on what your interests might be.
Clubs and sporting events are a great way to get social. But, don’t pick something based on it’s popularity! The most important thing when it comes to branching out is doing so genuinely. Pick a sport or event you’re interested in and get a move on! Yes, it can be a little intimidating going out alone. Many people have anxiety about not knowing anyone in a big gathering. Sometimes, you’ve got to push yourself out of your comfort zone and do something a little different. After all, your patterns have to change if you’re not happy with the way they are.
You can always sign up for classes as well. This can be a great way to make new friends as an adult. This automatically tells you that the other people in the class share a common interest with you. You’d be surprised how many people are going to be there, nervous and alone. You can bond over that. The next thing you know, you may have a new best friend.
Alright, it’s also intimidating to walk up to a complete stranger and say hello. I’m guilty of that one myself. But, once you do it, the conversation comes naturally. It’s only the first move that riddled with nerves. After that, you’ll be able to converse like you’ve known this stranger your whole life. If the conversation goes really well, it will naturally come to the point of exchanging information.
More often than not, you’ve just got to rely on your gut instinct. Don’t confuse that with your nerves though. Your nerves may tell you it’s weird to talk to someone you don’t know. “They may think you’re a freak”, your nerves will say. Your instinct will guide you to the people who are just as nervous as you. It all starts with a simple “hello”.
Or, you can always consider signing up with a dating agency. Many run events that focus on making new friends as adults rather than just dating.
Making new friends as an adult can be a big problem, especially if you are living in big and noisy cities, where everyone is busy commuting to and from, doing everyday the same chores. It strange but in big cities, where more people live, many people feel lonelier than in small towns. Plus people lose their skills for finding friendships in real life because everyone is online and many don’t know how to strike simple conversation
There will be many more choices in your future that will involve one party or another getting hurt. This is called life. Your feelings are what’s important.