How to avoid getting frustrated with dating by taking some simple dating expert recommended steps
As a dating coach , I help people start new relationships. Some people enjoy dating frequently, meeting new people, having brief relationships, but others date to find that one person they can truly see themselves with. Unfortunately, these people come to a point where they get frustrated with dating that they want to stop dating altogether. For them, dating becomes a chore and they start to hate going out on dates.
You might ask how can a person get tired of dating? There are usually no strings attached, you’re just on neutral grounds finding out things about each before it could swing both ways and the freedom to actually end it without any heavy implications. Sounds like a perfect arrangement but if it keeps ending in disappointment, you’re bound to feel a little frustrated with dating.
Now there are ways that you could avoid that kind of frustration with dating before you get frustrated with dating, and if you already are frustrated then you should still consider the following tips before thinking about dating;
Consider Yourself
Firstly, I have to be a little blunt with you. If you are getting tired of dating, then there is a very good chance the problem comes from something you are doing wrong.
When you’re in an interactive mode with someone, you need to seriously consider what you are doing in that situation. Why you are sitting there, talking to that person and why you want to see this person? You have to ask yourself whether you’re ready for making a commitment. You have to think about whether you’re confident about being your own person with them or are you too shy and self-conscious to open up in front of anybody. You have to think about all these things before you actually go out on a date.
Remember, you’re opening your horizons and the biggest part of this plan is you. If you’re not confident and sure about your life then you’re going to end up finding faults in yourself and rejecting anyone and everyone because of your lack of self-confidence.
(If you need help with building up you dating confidence then I’d love to work with you. You can see my dating coaching packages here)
Past Issues
It’s one thing to date because you’re trying to be with someone but it’s another because you are simply on the rebound. This exciting new person you are getting to know is a strange and that’s quite a wonderful thing. They know nothing about you and you’re getting a chance to start fresh with them. But that time, if your past keeps shadowing your dates, how can you move on? Of course, everyone brings some baggage with them but don’t let this drag you down and keep you from moving on. You should give the person you’re dating a chance and get to know them without comparing them to someone else.
No Judgement Calls
Just remember that dates, especially first ones, are not the place for quick judgement calls. The absolute key thing that you have to look out for is whether you had a good time or not. If you’re expecting to know the person in front of you in one date, all their likes and dislikes, their family and friends and how they are as a person, you’re putting too many pennies in the pot. Never make a judgement call in the first date and give up on them as nobody is ever truly themselves during a first meeting. If after three or four dates, you think that they are not the right person for you, then you can consider ending it with them. But please, give them a chance if you see potential!
It’s Not A Hunt
It’s called dating for a reason. It’s one single date in which you go out with someone. Don’t put pressure on yourself by making it a hunt for your next girlfriend/boyfriend or husband/wife. If you have extremely high expectations for the person that you’re meeting for the first time, you are probably setting yourself up for disappointment. Don’t limit yourself to focussing purely on the perfect man or woman that you want to be with. Trust me, they don’t exist! There are a lot of things that might surprise you about a person once you get to know them. So instead of hunting for a potential partner, meet them purely just for a fun evening and you never know what might happen.
Don’t be Monotonous
If you keep doing the same thing over and over again then you are naturally going to get bored. So stop going to the same places and having exactly the same conversations, A date is all about having a good time and getting to know each other as best you can. . You HAVE to be ready for anything that they’re up for or anything spontaneous that they come up with. You might actually have more fun than you expect when you let yourself relax a little. Sometimes a simple thing like trying a new drink or visiting a new part of town can make a huge difference.
Take a Break to Stop Getting So Frustrated with Dating
Never be afraid to have a little holiday from dating if you feel things are getting too much. Try a new online dating site or book up for a singles event to give you new opportunities. Or even better, set aside some alone time to relax or go and see your friends and family. This short period away with stop you getting frustrated with dating and hopefully fill you with renewed energy and hope.
If you take action on my advice, you’ll probably find that you’re going to leave a lot of things behind, make some changes and start remembering to give him/her a chance. You never know when you’ll find someone you really like so don’t give up now!
