Flowers on the First Date – Should you give them?
Back in the day, it was traditional for a man to bring a woman flowers on the first date. This was seen as a beautiful gesture that showed the woman he was interested in her. Flowers were expensive, even today they can burn a hole in your wallet. It was flattering to be spoiled in that manner. In the modern age, that sentiment has gone the way of the winds.
To put it in the most simple terms: Never bring someone flowers on a first date.
This out-dated tradition of colourful foliage upon a first meeting is no longer seen as flattering. Many women believe it to come across as desperate and even a little creepy. Flowers on first dates make you seem like you’re trying entirely too hard to be liked. Your date will immediately think “what’s wrong with him?” because it is seen as such a strange action. Trust me, I’ve been a Dating Coach for Men for 15 years so I know what to do!
Imagine meeting someone at a coffee shop with a bright bouquet of flowers. Now imagine where those flowers are going to sit throughout the date. Now imagine your date has to get on a bus or ride her bike home. How is she going to carry those flowers everywhere? Flowers are just obtrusive when you’re getting to know someone.
Yes, women still love flowers. But it’s a gesture that should be kept for the third or fourth date. This way, you know more about her and what she likes. She may be allergic to flowers or have pets/children in the house that might eat the flowers and fall ill. By waiting to give her flowers, you have the opportunity to find out this information. Ideally, you should only bring flowers when you’re picking her up at her house. This way, she has the ability to put them away as well.
Flowers on First Date – or another gift?
Most people don’t consider these issues when they think about making a good first impression. Of course, there are other ways to make a good impression on the first date, but flowers aren’t on the list. The best gift for a first date is something small and inexpensive. It should be something she’s already shown an interest in. A quick look on her Facebook or Instagram should give you a hint about what she likes. You’ll get bonus points if your gift references any previous conversation you’ve had. This is because it shows you pay attention and that you’re not playing games.
If you really want to seem charming like the men in the movies with flowers, there are two ways to make that impact. Your first option is choosing a single flower in a self-contained tube of water. These are often sold at flower shops, so they aren’t speciality. They are easier to carry around than a bouquet. If you want the charm without the creep, make sure you have a good sense of humour about the cliche gesture. The second option is buying her a fake flower. You don’t want a bottom of the barrel flower that will make her feel cheap, but a nice fake flower is still less expensive than a real one. You’ll get the same impact, the same look, without any of the complications that come from real flowers.
It’s always better to play it safe than to take unnecessary risks in the dating world. Hold off on buying a botanical garden. Show up to your date armed with only your sense of hum or and your wallet.